Beyoncé released an entire visual album reflecting a beautiful transformation from private and surviving to outright hurt, pissed, and ultimately forgiving. “Lemonade” has made women across the world question Bey or agree with her body of work. We can’t say if this was just a publicity stunt or if these events which seem so…hell, visual, happened to the married couple. But that’s none of our business, however, the question remains that if your man came walking into your home from “work,” smelling like his “secret,” would you remain quiet? Could you really smell another woman’s scent and accept it? Marriage is one hell of a ball game and leaving your marriage is such a difficult decision I’m sure, but adultery opens the door for a lot more issues.
As a woman who dates, I haven’t been outright cheated on to my knowledge. Text messages maybe, but never actual sexual relations even though who knows what happens behind closed doors and closed lips. I have loved a man or two before and so the idea of what I would possibly do has crossed my mind once or twice before. After a couple of years with a person, meaningful conversations, family gatherings, and great moments it’s hard to give up on them. But it’s also very difficult to continue on with a relationship after infidelity. Self-esteem goes down, trust is lost, and there always seems to be a constant state of what-if and who the hell wants to live like that? Beyoncé showed the world that being a wife to a cheating husband is a pain that grows on the woman no matter how famous, beautiful, and flawless she may appear. Loving a man that you swore under God to be there through thick and thin, ups and downs, sickness and health seem worthless if he’s sharing his body, his time, attention, and heart with another woman. Let’s be real, it’s a freakin’ slap in the face, to say the least. But what would you do?
Is there anything that can guarantee the pain will go away? How long does that process take? If I were married, I would probably go through the same realizations, epiphanies, and life changes like those hour long videos from “Lemonade.” I would probably sit in disbelief move forward to complete sadness, and grow angry. Anger always means that the sh*t has literally hit the fan and I want to f*ck me some stuff up! Imagine some of the things you do for your boyfriend then really imagine what you would do for your husband. I dated a man who was sweet as pie, loved his mama, and yet things ended and he went back home to his mother. Later, I found out that he was just not the man I thought he was. I thought it was me for the longest time. I cried and looked crazy as hell. I thought his mother was someone that understood a woman’s love and that we had a bond. But that wasn’t the case. I forgave him and then I didn’t want him. I wasn’t bitter. I wasn’t upset, I was relieved. I felt as if I had done the right “girlfriend” things even though I made mistakes. I had to realize that it wasn’t just me. We didn’t work out and it was over that quickly. “Lemonade” is a journey that women have tried to understand the last couple of days and though it’s not what everyone else thinks should happen, Beyoncé created an expressive visual range of emotions, art, and real perfection on her new album.
The realization is that Bey wasn’t only singing about her experiences, but the experience of every black woman that has ever loved a man. She’s referring to the journey of every black woman who has experienced the betrayal of the person she covets and loves, the experience of the hurting daughter waiting for her daddy to be her first love, and the journey of hurt in black women. It’s a breath of fresh air and because she understands the outcome, she shows the black woman to forgive. It is a resurrection of truth in the African American community and shows us “angry” black women that forgiving anyone, especially the man that has run us through the dirt, gives you power. Would I forgive my cheating husband? I would. I would because he doesn’t deserve to get out so easily. I deserve a man that will fight as long as he voices his desire to work it out and shows me with actions. Everyone doesn’t want to forgive, but what’s the point of taking a vow under God to try and make it work if both parties want it only to quit after infidelity?
What are your thoughts on “Lemonade”? What’s your thoughts on marital infidelity and forgiveness? Let us know.
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